..bright with despair..

I held a fallen star and it wept for me, dying.

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..happy new year..
pushing daisies
kolumbia
Happy New Year LJ! I had a very happy holiday and enjoyed gorging myself on food and sweets (and the promptly working out an hour over my scheduled time.) I am extremely proud to say, after being a smoker for six years, I stuck to my new years resolution and quit. I have been off the stuff for a week now, trying to keep my mind off of it, staying extremely busy, and i have one whole pack left somewhere that taunts me when i start to really get cravings. The other day, something upset me, i ran to grab one when no one was home, and i lit up. i was surprised at how nasty my mouth tasted and how i began to suddenly feel sick and it was not gratifying in the least. Oddly, I still have the cravings but I dont give in anymore. We'll see how it goes, keep your fingers crossed for me. Its definitely odd to spend hours working out and buying healthy foods and vitamins when belonging to the future cancer association. Donovan attempted to quit with me and miserably failed-or didnt begin to try. Either way, I know he's gotta do it himself on his own or else it'll never stick. I am really done. I should have never done it in the first place! Anyhoo, I want to slow down this year, enjoy the moments im in rather than being anxious about what my next move is. I don't listen, and I'm going to try really hard to fix that too. I'm trying to pick up the pieces of my credit, which collapsed completely after my seperation a few years ago. Ive been saving a ton as well and putting into retirement funds. Everything is going fairly well, I am excited for 2010. Ive been reading a lot lately, too, which has helped me feel thoughroughly me. I am making raviolis with chicken and brocolli bits, maybe my sense of taste will start to sharpen up too! woot!

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